“Grief is not a state but a process, like a walk in a winding valley with a new prospect at every bend.” — C. S. Lewis From the moment you wake up until your head finally hits the pillow, grief from infertility can feel like a weight you can’t outrun. Some days you come up for air; other days, it swallows you whole. I had known grief before, and it usually passed. But during a difficult adoption process, grief settled in and refused to leave. From the beginning, something abo

Year seven looks nothing like I was told it would. By now, according to the theology I grew up with, this should be over. God should have answered. His timing should have been perfect. The story should have reached its redemptive conclusion: the testimony with the happy ending where I stand up in church and declare how faithful God was through our infertility journey, baby in my arms. Instead, I'm staring down the reality that I'm aging out. That the door to adoption has slam

A different approach to gratitude We’ve all heard the well-meaning advice to focus on what we have rather than what we don’t have - “comparison is the enemy of contentment” or “comparison is the thief of joy”. But doing the often recommended “write down one thing you're thankful for a day” can feel pretty empty when you’re longing for a child, and instead are supposed to relish in your journal entry of “I’m thankful for the takeout we had for dinner”. It can feel like a rathe