I have realized that while I may have wanted a definitive answer, I wasn’t likely to receive it. I don’t have to make a big “forever decision”. My husband and I simply have to discern and decide what is best for us now, at this stage in life, or even just this month. At any juncture we can change course if we want to.

The love didn't begin with those pink lines, and it didn't end when the heartbeat stopped. This loss impacts us on a level that is at once spiritual, emotional, neurological and physical...Healing is not about "moving on from the loss", but rather moving on with the love you have for your child...Grief lingers because love came first, and that love never truly leaves us.

I never needed to try to fit in. I always have a place with Him. The things that make me unique may be the very things that allow me to connect with and help others. God can take the very place of our deep sorrow and hurt and transform it to become a fruitful place where others find hope and feel God's love.