I have realized that while I may have wanted a definitive answer, I wasn’t likely to receive it. I don’t have to make a big “forever decision”. My husband and I simply have to discern and decide what is best for us now, at this stage in life, or even just this month. At any juncture we can change course if we want to.

I never needed to try to fit in. I always have a place with Him. The things that make me unique may be the very things that allow me to connect with and help others. God can take the very place of our deep sorrow and hurt and transform it to become a fruitful place where others find hope and feel God's love.

That question caused the greatest spiritual struggle for me. Couldn’t God see that I was suffering? Why would God’s will be to cause me...