The call to surrender – to let go  and let God – is woven into the very fabric of our identity as Christians; but it is known in a particular way by those women bearing the burden of infertility. Those of us who have experienced the agony of being unable to conceive when it is the deepest desire of our hearts know without a doubt what it means to yield to a reality we cannot control.  I think that’s why, at one point in my journey, “surrender” became a trigger word for me. It

I am never content with the blessings that I have, but I see the next step, the next milestone, the next blessing I want. I'm single minded in my prayer, only talking to God about what I think I need. I fail to take into account all the blessings I do have, ignoring the fact that I used to pray for all the things I have now. I feel as if God is holding back from me the very thing that will make me happy, holy, the best version of myself.

Several years ago, my husband and I made a pilgrimage to St. Augustine, Florida to visit the shrine of Our Lady of La Leche . I had first heard about this Marian shrine from a friend, who described it as a peaceful place where she and countless others had visited to pray for a child . I arrived at the shrine not fully sure what to expect. Just a few hours later, I left in awe – transformed by an unexpected encounter with Christ. My encounter with Jesus took place in the sacra